Want to be mentally strong? Then never do this!

 

By Lisa Charles

Worried sml

Struggling to get your business off the ground, limited finance, and trying to balance work with family commitments are just a few examples where your mental strength can be pushed to its limits. You may find that your ability to remain strong depends on the situation, where with the best will in the world some challenges have you fully embracing everything and anything negative!

Of course everyone has their down times, but if you are striving to be that person who seems to keep it together no matter what, your down times have to be considerably less than your ‘nothing can keep me down!’ times.

If you are trying to find ways to overcome destructive negative habits and become the mentally strong prowess you aspire to be, then you absolutely MUST NOT:

1. Have a full blown pity party
Feeling sorry for yourself because of things that have gone wrong whether in your business or personal life will do little other than waste time. Life can be brutally unfair and sometimes we make colossal mistakes, but feeling sorry for yourself won’t change a thing. Instead, accept the setback and control your negative emotions by asking yourself ‘what can I do right now to make this better and move forward?’ A pretend depressive party without any guests or alcohol is no fun anyway!

2. Avoid and fight against change
Change is inevitable in life and fighting it just makes the transition that much harder. Even with the best laid plans, you have to be prepared to make changes and be flexible where needed. Try not to escape from positive change but embrace it instead, rather than seeking out the negative factors, focus on the positive and take full advantage of the opportunity for you to grow.

3. Blame everyone and everything when things go wrong
If you’re going to have any chance of learning from past mistakes you’re going to have to take responsibility for your own actions. Once you have done this you open yourself up for self evaluation, enabling you to fully understand exactly what when wrong and why. Solutions and new methods / strategies are much easier to find when you skip the blame game and take responsibility. Take control of your decisions and your future.

4. Compare your failures against other people’s success
Comparing yourself to other people, whether it’s their successful business, perfect relationship, super bright children or beautifully decorated house, encourages envy and bitterness. The negative energy that you permit to these destructive thoughts will just take away from any positive energy needed to move yourself forward. The thing is, I have found again and again that when looking in to other people’s lives from the outside it is very easy for everything to appear rosy and perfect, but in reality, absolutely everyone has their own problems, some of which may make you thankful that you have the challenges you have instead of theirs. No matter what your goal, you have a lot more chance of achieving it if you focus your energy on you and yours.

5. Worry what other people think of you
It is amazing how crippling this can be. Making decisions based on what you think other people think of you is one of the most destructive self limiting habits. People will always have opinions and will always surprise you with their sudden expertise in an area of interest for you, to which you know they have absolutely no experience. Know your purpose and push on. The worst thing is to live with regret, let go of the want to be all things to all people, mainly for the most simplistic reason – it’s impossible!

6. Give up when you meet failure
Once you fully accept that literally everyone on this earth has failed at something at some point, this habit will be easy to break. Of course some failures are much bigger than others with severe aftershocks, but no matter the severity, as long as you’re still breathing there is some self growth to be had with the opportunity to learn from it and move on. I’m sure you have heard of the many sayings like ‘fail your way to the top’ and it is worth taking heed of these words. There are countless success stories that are filled with chapters of failure, but the overriding theme is of perseverance. Imagine if as human beings we never persevered, firstly, we’d probably be living in the dark ages with none of the luxuries we take for granted today.

If you can conquer these bad habits, mental strength to be envied is well within your grasp!

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